My New Management Philosophy

I am not supposed to write about work under punishment of torture (or, as George Tenet might say, "enhanced interrogation") but I will give you a window into my new management philosophy.

Thanks to the boy for the enhanced version of the above.

Incidentally, Kenny the Torturer has turned me on to boxing. While I find it infinitely more enjoyable than endless lunges and the f-ing elliptical, one thing is painfully clear: I do not have much of a killer instinct. I just dont ever get that rush of blood to the head that makes me want to HURT someone. I'm more of a slow burn, I guess.

Hear me roar. Meow.

Has anyone/everyone read the Dark Materials trilogy? Each character in the book has an animal representation of their soul or conscience that is alive and hangs out with them. The movie starring Daniel Craig (aka Bond the Thug) and Nicole Kidman (aka the Q Tip) comes out this summer. As part of movie publicity they have a website set up to allow you to choose your own daemon. I took the test this morning in a misguided bid to procrastinate at work. What do you think?

Mozza Review: I'm not easily intimidated

So, Mozza. The headline is: good food, crap service. You want more? Of course you do.

If you get 4 foodies at a pizza place like this, they are not going to agree on an order. With around 15 different pizzas to choose from, we decided to do the American thing and vote for our favorites. We each ticked our top 3 choices and tallied the votes on the paper menus. After ordering, our waitress said "you wrote on your menus?" and then said she only wanted to take the menus that had not been scribbled on, like we were errant 3 year olds playing with crayons. This isnt bloody Le Cirque - this is a pizza place with paper placemats, paper napkins and paper menus, fer chrissakes. So far, so annoying.

For antipasti, we opted for fried squash blossoms and crispy goat cheese on beet greens. Both were fantastic: crispy and creamy in all the right places. There was an interesting spice we tasted in the greens. When asked which spice, the waitress sniffed "salt and pepper". Grrr. Then we had the Mozza Caprese - their version has roasted cherry tomatoes and burratta. Really lovely.

So for the pizza, the clam pizza was vetoed over protests, and the hanging chad controversy dogging the "accidental" vote for the sopressata pizza did cloud the proceedings somewhat. The mushroom and fontina was the clear winner in both pre and post votes. The fennel sausage, panna and red onion runner up. The not-entirely-successful-but-still-a-nice-try award goes to the rapini, black olive, cherry tomato and anchovy pizza. They do a nice crust, crispy but substantial enough to not sog-up when loaded w fillings.

The buzz over the butterscotch budino is well-deserved. Salty, sweet, creamy, carmelly....mmmm. The strawberry and cassis sorbets were fab too - why do I never order sorbet? I always enjoy it, and surely it cant be the heart attack in a giant yum that the butterscotch pudding was. Oh well.

As for the service: a fleet of rabidly over-eager bus boys hovered over us the entire meal, snatching our plates and glasses before we had even finished them. We had to stop them not once or twice, but 4 times. If the goal was to make us feel utterly unwelcome and get us out as soon as possible, then they succeeded. I would definitely go back for the pizza, but would get it as takeaway and eat it at home where I can scribble in peace.

How did you find us?

Big food weekend, people. (Dont tell Kenny the Torturer)

Burgers at Father's Office: very, very large and very good. All of the hype is probably true. I'm slightly put off by the "no substitutions, no alterations, no table service" etc etc attitude, but I will put up with a lot to get at carmelized onions and blue cheese.

Discovery: El Parian. Reputed to be one of the best taquerias in Los Angeles, but the owner/manager seemed very surprised to see us. "How did you find us?" he asked, not unkindly. He personally put together a sampler plate of their meats so we could choose (how nice was that!). He included the house specialty barbecued goat, carnitas (deep-fried pork), and carne asada. All had their charms: the goat was very nice and tender, but we were slightly put off by the bones and skin, the carnitas were delicious, but the carne asada really stood out. I tried to order 2 tacos, but the o/m gently cautioned that their tacos are not the small ones that they serve at the roach coaches in town so we all scaled back to one carne asada taco, rice & beans, and a cold negra modelo. A rough neighborhood, but a very friendly place.

Sunday Supper at Lucques. Starter was a grilled asparagus salad w blood oranges. I'm not a fan of fruit in my salad, but it was a really nice balance of sweet and savoury. We all opted for the braised lamb with baby sprinig veg including turnips. I've decided turnips get a bad rap and instantly resolved to eat more of them. The lamb did more than fall apart, it disintegrated (but in a good way). Dessert was an almond cream tart with blueberries and candied kumquats - light and tasty. We had the suggested California Zinfandel with the lamb, and blood orange sours to start. Another successful dinner at Lucques.

Other highlights:

• we tried the banana cream pie at House of Pies - nice banana content, but the use of whipped topping instead of whipped cream, was a disappointment. I'm going for the butterscotch pie next time.
• Hollywood Farmers Market: beets and strawberries looked beautiful. bought some mint, dill, and sage plants in another probably doomed attempt to start an herb garden. and, of course, bought the frozen tamales from the tamale man for later enjoyment.
• We skipped Shaherzad in Tehrangeles, because of the enormous burgers earlier in the day. We went to the local sushi bar for some palate cleansing raw fish.
• In case you think that all we do is eat out, I did make some grilled tandoori chicken on Thursday and broiled trout w steamed broccoli on Friday. So there.

Mozza tonight! I LOVE having visitors in town!

What is the wet stuff that falls from the sky?

Oh, yeah...rain. I forget.

Yes it IS raining here in Los Angeles. Only 2 inches of rain has fallen since last JULY 1! No wonder my plants are dying. I thought it was my black thumb, but I feel slightly better now. Everyone in Los Angeles gets slightly hysterical at the slightest amount of rain. Brits would be having a picnic in their bikinis in similar conditions.

I have completed my "Best Of" slide show from the Japan trip. There are still over 200 photos, but impressive considering that's culled from over 1000. Click here if you want to see.

According to my new Google Analytics measuring device (shout out to my reader(s) in Slough!), my page views go up dramatically on Mondays. I will try to update over the weekend so you have something new to read on Monday. You will have to wait until Tuesday for my review of Mozza, but you will have my review of Sunday Supper at Lucques and the burgers at Father's Office. We are also going to try and make it to a Persian restaurant in Tehrangeles, the Iranian neighborhood. John McCain is not invited.

Open Love Letter to the Boy

Why he is cute:

1. He thinks Duke Lacrosse is a minor member of the British royal family.

2. He has never heard of Don Imus, and attempts to explain the kerfuffle have thus far been unsuccessful.

3. He STILL does not know who Dannielynn's babydaddy is and shows interest not measurable by existing technology.

From my mom: Spring in Oregon looks a little like I remember Spring in MN

Wincing the night away

Apologies for delay, but was taken over by yesterday's events. Sad. You see a lot of shit in this job, but this stuff still gets to you.

The Boy and I went to an incrediblesupergreat concert on Saturday night, a fundraiser for KCRW radio station. Seven bands played, plus 2 DJs at the after party (sponsored by Absolut, free vodka!) You can read a proper review here, but I concur w most of the observations. The Shins, Travis, and Cold War Kids (pictured above) were all great, but the highlight was Rodrigo y Gabriela - A Mexican duo who play death metal on acoustic guitars. They had the whole crowd on their feet with their version of Stairway to Heaven. The Pinkertones dj'd the after party. I danced my butt off, while The Boy bobbed up and down in a most adorable fashion.

Little Bundles of Joy

Strawberry season has arrived in California. A report on the news says the industry has completely recovered from the early season freeze. I can assure all of my many readers in the UK (ahem.) that strawberries in California are among the most perfect delectable treats in the world and put the woody tasteless red blobs you limeys call strawberries to shame. Oh yeah, and thanks for pulling your troops out of Iraq too.

Incidentally, we saw a package of 18 perfect strawberries in a food market in Japan. The cost: $120.

First session since my holiday with Kenny the Torturer last night. The Boy is trying to convince me to change his tag to Kenny the Devastator, but I think that sounds too much like a professional wrestler. He promised to make yday's workout only a 4 on the Day After Pain Scale (DAPS). I'm hovering near a 5 at the moment.

More on Japan

What a geek I am.

Annnnyway, as promised, top meals:

1. Izakaya is like Japanese tapas - lots of little dishes meant to be eaten while out for a night on the town (very similar in theory to the Spanish). We went to a great place in Kyoto along a canal called Menami. They didnt have any English menus, so the waiter took me back to the kitchen and showed me different dishes. This is where I learned the value of the Japanese word "omakase" which basically means "you choose, my esteemed waiter, because you seem very nice and I trust your judgement. but no pig uterus please". Highlights: grilled quail (seen above) with a lemony-peppery marinade, sauteed mushrooms & greens, and yuba (a preserved soymilk skin. yes, seriously.). Also - the serving plates were amazing!

2. Kaiseki definition: "Japanese haute cuisine served at a meeting, social gathering or ceremony. Typically each dish is served on individual trays and includes foods that are simmered, steamed, roasted, fried, seasoned with vinegar and pickled. Appetizer, soup, fruit for dessert, and rice are also part of the presentation". Very elaborate. We had a couple and found them, er, challenging. You get some dishes that are the best you've ever had, and other dishes with strange pink and white floating things. The whole process of dinner takes up to 2 hours. Still, very Japanese and the presentation blows your mind. Highlights: the sashimi was always among the best we had, and there was usually an impressive roasted or grilled fish.

3. We went to a place in Kanazawa called the Chopstick Cafe - izakaya again. Not the best food we had, although definitely the most fun. Everyone was shouting and laughing and trying desperately to talk to us in Japanese. We ordered their signature dish ("omakase" came in handy again): a piece of raw marinated mackerel served on an ice cube the size of a large brick. The spiky-haired anime waiter comes out, winks at us and says "showtime"(which causes the entire restaurant to erupt in laughter), then whips out a large blowtorch and flames the top of the mackerel. I think it tasted good, but I was laughing so hard by that point I kind of forget.

4. All the sushi. I suppose the sushi in the fish market in Tokyo was the best we had.

5. Surprisingly, western desserts: not the rustic apple tart-type of dessert, but the elaborate fussy Marie Antoinette-style petit fours and napoleons. The dessert floor (yes, floor) at the Tokyo and Kyoto department stores have to be seen to be believed.

Japanese foods I never warmed to:

desserts made from beans

rice crackers, no matter how beautiful.

boiled tofu, especially for breakfast

pickled mountain vegetables, which seem to accompany bloody everything.

BREAKING PIZZA NEWS

We interrupt my random Japan ramblings to break this exclusive news report: I have secured a reservation at Pizzeria Mozza. Granted its for 5pm on a Monday in 2 weeks, but that should not diminish my Herculean efforts. This from the LAT:

Pizzeria Mozza isn't just a restaurant. It's an action film, a master class in
the art of making pizza, a trip through Italy's wine regions and a magnet for a
diverse crowd of hungry diners only Los Angeles could muster. It's the toughest
reservation in town, maybe in the country right now, the place where everybody
in the food world wants to eat. After months of buzz and speculation, Nancy
Silverton, who brought us La Brea Bakery and co-founded Campanile, and Mario
Batali, the New York chef with a big appetite and an ever-growing collection of
high-profile restaurants, have finally opened part one of Mozza at the corner of
Melrose and Highland avenues.

AND they serve lardo. Mmmmm lardo. Kenny the Torturer will be verrrrrry angry.

Back to more Nippon natters tomorrow. The computer is making my eyes burn.

Japan: Let the Analysis Begin!

I'm still organizing the pictures, hoping to pull together some sort of greatest hits slideshow i.e., all the photos where I look thin and my hair is somewhat under control. Sadly, I spent most of this weekend encased in marshmallow (or at least thats what it felt like) so that exceedingly difficult task may take weeks.

Incidentally, there ARE photos. Oh ARE THERE PHOTOS. 500 of them to be exact, and that's just mine - havent downloaded Iain's yet. If you are really bored, and I mean REALLY bored, and want to test the speed of your web link, you can look at them by clicking here: I AM REALLY BORED AND WANT TO LOOK AT RACHEL'S VACATION PHOTOS.

There's SO much to say, I might try and organize this in the most pedantic way possible: lists. If you have any specific questions (ha!) let me know.

FIVE BEST EXPERIENCES ON MY JAPAN HOLIDAY.
1. Kyoto as a whole was pretty cool, but the temples (esp. Golden and Silver Pavillions, Kiyamizu, and Ryoanji) really rocked the Zen house.
2. Morning prayers at the Buddhist temple on Mount Koya was a really different experience. Before you think I'm going all Richard Gere on you, it was more observational than participational, but v. v. interesting. Not the sort of thing you do every day.
3. Cold sake is my new best friend, but it still took me till the end of the damn trip to learn how to say "cold sake, and fast please" in Japanese. I think its something like "reishu" followed by a snort and a dismissive hand wave. I couldnt really carry it off.
4. Naoshima is an entire island that's been transformed into an art project. A fascinating idea, and has to be seen to be believed. You must go. Now.
5. This is going to sound incredibly shallow, but the big department stores in Tokyo are superfun and sent me into a frenzy. I need to lie down just thinking about it again.

FIVE MOST DISAPPOINTING THINGS ABOUT MY TRIP TO JAPAN.
1. Very few people speak English, or are very very shy about speaking it, so we didnt really meet a lot of new people.
2. No Sumo. Was the off-season.
3. People still smoke there.
4. We didnt really do any nightlife in Tokyo or Kyoto.
5. The Japan Rail Pass doesnt cover the top fastest level of the bullet trains, so I didnt really bullet.

TOMORROW: Five best meals and Five best hotels

We saw Blades of Glory this weekend. Really really funny. I love that dopey crap.

Breakfast our first morning in Japan

I'm pretty sure it was some sort of miso soup with the added attraction of, er, shrimp heads. Just the heads, mind you. No sign of what most of the world considers the edible portion on this particular creature.

Well we're back. I'm v v jetlagged, so will save the more sophisticated insights until later. We had a great time, ate, drank, and pantomimed our way across the little island. Stand by for hair-raising tales and exclusive photos of strange food, bullet-y trains, Iain in the bath, the Starshit Enterpee, and cherry blossoms ad nauseum etc etc etc. Whew....